The Accidental Bibliophile: How Saying Yes Led Me to 4 Book Clubs

If you looked at my Soul pillar goals, you would have a seen a lot of talk about finding my people. You would have seen my plans for cinema clubs, run clubs, and intentional apps like RealRoots. I thought that by finding these specific intersections, I would find my community.  What you wouldn't have seen - mostly because it wasn't in the plan - was a goal to join four different book clubs. And yet, here I am. A person who hasn't been a "reader" for years, currently juggling four different reading lists. But the thing about community is that it rarely stays within the lines you draw for it. 

The New Metric is Rest

Training for a half-marathon usually feels like a challenge to fit in as many miles as possible. We are taught to value the miles, the split times, and the total weekly volume above everything else. But as I move deeper into this training cycle, I am realizing that the most important number on my schedule isn't the distance of my long run—it’s the quality of my recovery. I have officially shifted my focus: the new metric is rest.

The realization that daily movement is not sustainable without intentional rest has been a slow but necessary evolution. When I started the Radiant 90, I was primarily focused on the streak of showing up for 30 to 60 minutes every single day. I wanted the proof of my consistency. But I’ve learned that "showing up" doesn’t always mean putting on my running shoes. Sometimes, showing up for my long-term goals means having the discipline to stay on the couch. It means recognizing that my body is a biological system that requires repair, not a machine that can be pushed indefinitely without consequence.

Winter was the Trial, Spring is the Alignment

We’ve been conditioned to believe that January 1st is the only day that counts. We’re taught to wake up in the coldest, darkest month of the year and suddenly have our entire life mapped out. But nature doesn't work that way. Nothing in nature blooms in the winter. Winter is for quiet, for resting, and for figuring out what is still alive under the frost.

I’m realizing that January and February were never the "start." They were the trials. They were the two months I needed to figure out what my actual goals for the year were.

Even if you set goals in January—which I did—the start of spring is the time to reset and retool. It’s the time to look at what you thought you needed in the winter and see if it actually aligns with where you are now.

The Quiet and the Crowd: Rebuilding Connection from the Inside Out

I have always been a person who is comfortable in my own company. Living in a city like Houston, it’s easy to navigate the world as a solo traveler. I don’t mind going to the theater alone, exploring a new coffee shop, or heading out for a run without a partner. I actually value my alone time; it’s where I recharge.

But lately, I’ve had to acknowledge that there is a difference between being independent and being isolated. 

My social life is anchored by my family, and I’m grateful for that. But as I’ve moved into my 30s, I’ve felt the absence of a peer circle. When I was in school, friends were just part of the landscape. As I got older, the ‘slow fade’ set in. Life got busy, distances grew, and because I didn’t put in the effort to maintain those connections, they eventually just vanished. 

The Financial Reset: Why Awareness is the Ultimate Act of Self-Care

For a long time, I operated on a "don't look, don't tell" policy with my money. It wasn’t that I was being reckless; I was just financially unaware. I moved through the world on a sort of financial autopilot, knowing I had enough to get by but never actually looking closer. But being unaware is its own kind of stress. It’s a low-level anxiety that hums in the background of everything you do because you don’t actually know where you stand.

Two years ago, I decided that being "unaware" was no longer an option. I realized that if I wanted to build a life that felt grounded and peaceful, I had to start with the numbers.

Now, as part of The Audit, I’ve realized that personal finance isn't a chore—it’s the most foundational form of self-care there is. It’s about giving myself the respect of knowing exactly where I am, so I can decide exactly where I’m going.

Making Peace with the Middle: Why I’m Romanticizing the "Work in Progress"

I spent my 20s doing exactly what I was supposed to do. I left home for college, lived away for a decade, and honestly, life was good. It wasn't a disaster, and I wasn't struggling. However, I realize now that I wasn’t being as intentional as I could have been, especially when it came to managing my finances.

In 2021, I made the decision to move back in with my mom after she purchased her new home. This wasn’t a hasty retreat; it was a conscious choice to transition from merely coasting through life to actively building something meaningful. Two years ago, I finally decided to take my finances seriously, and last year, I embarked on the slow but rewarding journey of remodeling my room to make it truly feel like my own sanctuary.

The thing about The Oasis pillar of my Radiant 90 journey is that it isn't a finished project. My room is very much a work in progress. My bathroom still needs to be finished, and there are a dozen minor things in the bedroom that I haven't crossed off the list yet.

But I’m learning that the middle is where life actually happens.

Reconnecting with the Coil: Why I’m Taking the "Lazy" Out of My Hair Care

I’ve been natural since 2018. Back then, the transition was a thrill. Even though it was a steep learning curve, I loved every second of the process. I loved watching my Type 4 hair grow, seeing how the textures changed, and figuring out what my curls actually needed.

But a funny thing happens when you finally get the length and thickness you were dreaming of. You start to underappreciate it.

I realized I was just expecting my hair to stay healthy without actually putting in the work. Last year, I spent almost the entire year in protective styles. I told myself I was "protecting" my hair or "optimizing growth," but if I’m being honest, I was just being lazy. A protective style stops being protective the moment you stop caring for the hair underneath it. I was hiding my curls because I didn't want to deal with the time they required.

This year, I realized I actually missed my hair. I missed the texture, the ritual, and the feeling of my own curls. And that's why I’m recommitting to giving my curls the love and attention they deserve.

The Ego of Starting Over: Why I’m Back at Square One

If you looked at my race medals from the last two years, you’d see a successful running journey. I kicked off 2023 with my very first 5K, and by 2024, I had confidently progressed to a half marathon. Last December, I reached a significant milestone by crossing the finish line of a full marathon. On the surface, it looked like I was hitting all the benchmarks a runner is expected to achieve.

But here’s the thing: there’s a difference between merely finishing a race and truly training for one.

Why I’m Choosing Radiance: My 90-Day Journey to Connection and Strength

January is often seen as the month for dreaming. It’s that quiet time where we recover from the holiday whirlwind, jot down half-hearted resolutions in shiny new notebooks, and envision an ideal version of ourselves that feels just beyond our grasp. But if January is for dreaming, February is for doing.

This week, I am drawing a line in the sand. I am embarking on a personal 90-day challenge I’m calling The Radiant 90.

For too long, I’ve felt a subtle but persistent void in my life—a gap where community and true connection should be. It’s easy to fill that void with distractions: endless scrolling, busywork, or just the noise of daily life. But ignoring it hasn't made it go away. This challenge isn't just another fitness reboot or a hair growth journey, though those are parts of it. At its core, this is about mending that gap. It is about showing up for myself, and by extension, showing up for others, in a way I never have before.

I am choosing "Radiance" because radiance isn’t surface-level. It’s energy. It’s the heat you generate when your internal world is aligned with your external actions. Over the next three months, I am committing to building that heat, day by day, habit by habit.